What To Do When Your Parents Don’t Want You To Become An Artist? 

By: Grand Bruit 

January 3, 2026 

The truth is many people just see their parents during the holidays or they will go visit them a couple times a year. But why not try being a friend to your parents. This is easier said than done. But there are real benefits to this. For instance, parents have more lived experience than we do by definition. Also, we are connected by blood; they are the reason we are alive. If it wasn’t for them, we wouldn’t be here. So there is an inherent bond that should be aknowledged first and foremost. 

Parents appreciate being heard. This involves listening to what they have to say & allowing them to have a voice. Even if we disagree, it shows respect if we don’t give in to arguing and debates and ridicule. 

How to listen? 

Don’t be thinking about what to reply while the parent is speaking. Try and receive all the information they have to say, because if we try and formulate the smartest-possible-reply, then we will miss out on important details they are trying to convey. 

A person shouldn’t assume that he knows everything and that his parent knows nothing. Everyone has a lived experience and deserves grace. 

Understand that you are missing out by not allowing your parents to be part of your life. 

Let’s be honest, everyone has a lived trauma, some worse than others though. Without picking too deeply at the wound, the truth is, there may be resentment. Now I’m not a psychiatrist so I won’t pick at the wound too deeply. But try not to suppress your feelings. Try and face them when you’re ready. This should be done under the supervision of a professional mental health practitioner, and perhaps with the usage of a prescribed medication, but it will bring great healing. 

Let Your Parents See Your Good Reputation In The Community. 

Imagine your parents come visit your place of employment, what would you want your coworkers or your manager to say to your parents? Clearly your desire would be that your work colleagues would have good things to say to your parents like: “Your daughter is such a hard worker! And she always goes above and beyond! Your daughter has a positive influence on the workplace!”… Etc. Etc. 

So being a consciencious worker might not be our top priority, let’s be honest. But the truth is, if we have a good reputation in the workplace, our parents will eventually find out, and it will reassure them that we aren’t wasting our time in the art studio being self-employed. 

It could actually have for effect of making our parents let go of their anxiety regarding our low wage as a struggling artist. This may appear like a miniscule victory, but in reality, is it not true the humongous pressure an artist can feel from family at times? Would it not make sense that reducing this pressure by reassuring the parents, that this can be beneficial for an artist and is not something to be dismissed too quickly? 

I know, relationships with parents is murky. No one’s story is perfect. We all have disappointments and to a certain extent we carry a degree of shame accumulated over the generations. It’s true, in some cases, differences are irreconcilable. That is regrettable but it’s the reality for some. This article won’t apply to everybody’s situation. I understand that.  

The Highs And Lows of How People Perceive Artists 

So, to carry on the discussion towards completion, think about the story told by your art. Art is at once a highly respected trade, and at the same time something that can easily be dismissed. Why is that? It’s partly because absolutely anyone can draw; the first thing kids do is make drawings with colored wax crayons, or make sculptures with Play Doh! Absolutely anyone from age 001 to 100 can do art. It is known that even people terribly handicapped are able to struggle through their pain and symptoms to create beautiful art. 

But because it is something that absolutely anyone can do, it has almost become something to be dismissed as a generic, meaningless activity. It’s like if someone plays a song on the piano and the response is to dismiss it and say, “Absolutely anyone could play that.” 

But something that requires great training, like Law, or Medicine, or Engineering, these are things that only few are able to achieve and have great prestige. Has anyone ever heard of parents who were disappointed their child became a Medical Doctor, a Physician? These are great accomplishments. Very few are able to achieve this level of distinction. 

On the other hand, people will think “Art? Anyone can do that. It is a lesser trade.” That can be hard to deal with, because when an artist shows their piece of art to someone, there is a subconscious thought that people have, along the lines of “It’s literally just a piece of paper. It is nicely colored, but it is only a piece of paper in a frame. What is the value of paper? It is just pulp, a wood product. Paper is so delicate, fragile. It doesn’t last.” But a medical doctor, “Wow. They preserve life. They actually make sick people better. Now that’s a trade.” 

This is the dilemma for many artists. However, there is reason for optimism, because everyone has a story to tell. We all have a different lived experience and something to bring to the table. And as much as we developped on the fact that anyone can do art; when it is well done, art is one of the highest forms of human achievement. It inspires the strongest, most passionate emotions in people. It allows us to relate to one another and can create a sense of unity among men. 

So with all this in mind, it can really be a roller coaster, the life of an artist. At once, people are tearing us down and shredding us to pieces, while other people have just been totally inspired by our work. 

To bring this full-circle to the main theme of this article, when our parents see how our work is actually touching people, when they hear that our work is actually inspiring people and that our work is bringing people together, which is the highest aim of the arts, our parents may begin to see the value of our trade, and of the choice we made to become artists. And the truth is, for most of us, we really do hope our parents approve of our choice of employment. 

Be open to certain adjustments by showing flexibility 

Our parents do want the best for us, and sometimes, without giving up our trade, there are areas we can be more comprehensive towards our parents’ wishes. For example, parents will always feel a certain degree of worry about their children because they love them. So what are some methods we can show flexibility with regard to our artistry? 

Maybe we could benefit from the advice of a parent. For example, what if we are missing out on a marketing opportunity that they point out to us? For example, marketing is partly about getting brand recognition, and perhaps our parent knows about a tried and true method to get exposure? 

What if they have a photograph of a beautiful landscape and they are sure it could make a nice painting? Why not give it a try and show them the results? This type of collaboration could turn out better than expected! Trying to listen to their advice could be very useful even though it can be painful.  

The bottom line is, our parents will be reassured if we make good decisions. This can involve seeking out advice from professionals in our field. Or also being someone in the workplace who is known for being helpful. Or also being someone in the workplace who values the ideas of others.  

Top 8 Ways To Make Parents Happy? 

  • Accept that sometimes you’re going to be wrong, and don’t get upset when someone points out a mistake. The effect that this will have on your growth will be enormous and your parents will be reassured. 
  • Don’t gossip too much about other artists or creatives in the studio. People might start to wonder, “If that’s how he talks about so and so behind their back, then… What are they saying about me?” That could create friction and a sour feeling. If you are careful with that and thus have a good reputation, that will be reassuring to your parents. 
  • Be convincing and unafraid to market your brand with a level of smoothness. This ties into that old myth of being a sell-out. The truth is, good art is good art. If you don’t give up your identity as an artist, you shouldn’t feel bad about marketing your art. It isn’t the marketing that is often the problem. If people can relate to your art, then you’ve done your job. This will reassure your parents because they want to see you grow your business. 
  • Be open to seize opportunities for growth and development of your craft. This can be done in small, daily habits like having a chat with other artists at the studio, or fostering acquaintanceships with others who have lots of experience. It takes confidence to initiate communication and go out of one’s comfort zone. But when we have a good heart-to-heart and really hear someone out, we will see it’s well worth it. This will make our parents happy because they will see we are part of a community, which demonstrates stability and integration. 
  • Have a reasonable attitude towards social events and resist the urge to drink an equal amount of alcohol to the others at the event. Some people are known to over drink, and peer pressure can be very strong, but it’s important to maintain a degree of dignity. Our parents will be happy if they know we won’t end up on social media making a fool of ourselves. That would be really disappointing for them. But it would make them happy to know we are reasonable at social gatherings and are able to make responsible choices, this will certainly help ease their worry about our decision to become an artist. 
  • People will begin to respect you when you begin to make a name for yourself as an artist. People might give you more attention and could begin to give you greater prominence in the community. This newfound distinction comes with greater responsibility, because the bigger they come, the harder they fall, so to speak. It will be reassuring to your parents to know that you are using your voice responsibly on social media or in the community.  
  • Try and avoid big confrontations and heated debates. Usually, even if we are in the right, there will be little pay off and it will just create noise and irritation. The truth is, we may be fighting for a noble cause and may be fighting for what is right. But the truth is, if it gets heated and boils over onto social media, it will just distract from your actual work and the art will end up taking a back seat. So to reassure our parents, we can show them that we don’t get distracted easily or get into heated debates that lead nowhere. This will give them confidence that you are reasonable and able to control yourself when there are arguments. And it will make them sure that you are in control of your emotions. 
  • Control your energy, don’t bite off more than you can chew, but keep marching forward in your projects. Keep making progress in the workplace. You may not be particularly powerful and strong, but the truth is, art is quite an easy trade, all things considered. Most work is do-able by most people. The question is, can the employee remain calm and collected in the process? Because it is clear that when someone is anxious, everything becomes much more difficult and there is a far greater pressure. It’s the difference between taking a walk in jogging pants and sweater, and taking a walk while needing to carry a 100-lbs weight. In the first instance, we could go on for hours. In the secondary case, we’re not getting farther than ten steps perhaps. So by controlling these things and extending our output time, this will boost productivity and be pleasing to our parents. 

To Be Continued… 

Cheers, 
Grand Bruit